Thursday, October 14, 2010

مكاتيب السنيين

There is something incredibly haunting about Fairuz's new song; ايه, في أمل

There is the fact that her voice has matured so..
 a ba77a keda, at the turn of every phrase at the start of a sigh, at the push of a sentiment.
There is also such a contrast to her usual song. mesh 3arfa ezzay..

She recounts a love is no longer معقول
bas not with the longing, the yearning, or the ridiculing anger that i'm used to..

في أمل؟ 
إيه في أمل، أوقات بيزهر من ملل....و أوقات لللحظة  ليخفف زعل

As in one of my favorate songs; 

في إدامي مكاتيب السنين

bas this time;

حبيييبي، حبيييبي، ما عاد يلمسني الحنين

There is no denial of a past;
في ماضي منيح بس مضى
صفى بالريح بالفضه

bas there is deep closure
وبيضل تذكار عن مشهد صار
في خبز، في ملح،في رضى

There's even her own disbelief that something, once so strong, is no longer there..
حبييييبي، احساسي هال أد معقوله بيزول

Perhaps it is how sobering the song is. Perhaps it is all that she is coming to. All that was beautiful that is gone. Mash-had we enqada. All the memories that remain, but the feelings that cannot be rekindeled. There is no drama, but there is also no حنين

There is her contemplation of all that is good, and all that is possible, her affirmation that 'ايه, في أمل
but that it does not emerge of a possibility; this hope, perhaps a yearning for a nostalgia that is no longer there...

It's always impossible to listen to fairuz sing and not relate on some level. it's impossible not to imagine her having felt every word , experienced it to the core.
bas there's something so much deeper and probing about this song. it's not their relationship. or maybe this is how i relate to it. something deeply binding between us and a world that changes so quickly. why hope springs up at times, and why you know better than it. An acknolwedgement of all that is beautiful, but a sobering realization of how with every day, her life too passes, and the necessity of moving on.

ta-nerja3 , la2 mesh ma32ul. There's no going back.

With every realization she starts with a probing, pleading; '؛حبيييييبي، حبيييييبي as if to break it softly, reaussringly..

and with every 'acknowledgement' of all that 'was' beautiful, there is a catch;  a catching, almost croaked 'بس

She ends it, knowing how much of her 'short-sightedness' he has been propogating to others. Perhaps his disbelief that she will not reconsider.
and this subtle, haunting, and punctuating end; 
حبيبي كرماللي، اتنيناتنا بنعرف شو صار

but we don't know. for a change. 

and we're left with a song that confirms that ايه, في أمل
But, with a newer more matured fairuz, in a world that is so different from her last beit el dine concert, she reminds us;
تنرجع: لأ مش معقول